I was sitting on the front porch while listening to music in my iPod when my phone suddenly rang. “Hey, sup?” I answered it without looking at who the caller was.
“Aye, Vania I’ve been trying to reach you last night but you weren’t answering. I was worried.” Harry’s deep phone said on the other line. I hate when he acts all concerned. It makes me feel special. I hate feeling special to him because I know I never will be.
“Don’t worry, Haz, I’m fine.” I almost mumble.
“Well, you do sound like it. I’m coming over.”
I didn’t want him to come but before I could tell him my thoughts, he hung up.
Yesterday, my boyfriend broke up with me – or should I say ex-boyfriend. Harry was worried about me. I bet he was worried that I’d cut but surprisingly I didn’t. I didn’t cut last night. I didn’t cut despite my breakup. Maybe it was because that’s what I really needed – a breakup. Maybe I wasn’t that in love with him anymore. Maybe, just maybe.
I stayed there for a while until I saw his car pulling over. He hopped off his car and walked towards me on the porch as he took off his sun glasses. I don’t know why but he always manages to give me the butterflies in my stomach. I get so confused just by thinking about how I really feel about this boy. I sighed.
“I told you I was fine.” I said as he seated beside me.
“I just want to make sure.” There was concern in his voice.
“Come, on.” I gave him the “are you serious” look.
He laughed a little and got up.
“Hey, where are you going?”
“Not me, us.” He grabbed both of my hands and pulled me up.
“Okay, so where are we going?”
“You’ll see.” He dragged me to his car.
It took us about 20 minutes to get to where we’re heading. I looked through the window of his car and saw the beautiful surroundings. That’s when I realized that he took me to a hill which I’ve never been before. I turned to my side to face him and smiled. “This is beautiful but what are we doing here?”
“I just thought you needed to see this kind of beauty.” He said as he got out from the car and so did I.
He started walking up the hill while I was following behind him. I would be happier at this moment if I knew that the guy I’m with loves me too. I shook my head to that thought. Why was I even fantasizing about him? All he’s ever going to be is my best friend and that’s all. End of story.
I raised my gaze from the ground and saw him looking at me and smiling. “What?”
“Nothing.” He said and looked away.
There go the butterflies again. I sighed and sat beside Harry on the grass. I really think I like this dude. The thought was kind of disturbing but I know I’ll get used to it sooner or later.
I wanted to tell him about this funny yet disturbing yet really good to feel feeling of mine but I’m really afraid of how he’s going to react.
I sat quietly with him with my eyes looking at something far away.
“Hey, Vania?” He broke the silence.
“Yeah?” I faced him.
“Are you really that sad because of your breakup with that twat?”
I snorted which gave him a very confused expression. “Sad? I’m nowhere near that. I already told you, I’m okay. I don’t even know why but I kinda don’t regret anything. I don’t regret the fact that we broke up. He was a douche.
He just nodded and looked away.
“How about you? You haven’t dated anyone for centuries.” I tried to lighten up the mood and gladly succeeded.
He smiled. “I don’t know, Van. I really like this girl but I don’t know how to tell her. I mean, what if she doesn’t like me back?” He looked at me again.
I snorted. “Are you kidding me, Harry? Who wouldn’t like you? Seriously, you’re like perfect and all. You’re kind, sweet, adorable” I paused and looked down. “You’re very beautiful, Harry.”
“What?” He said silently.
“I-I” I didn’t finish what I was about to say. I got up and ran away. I almost slipped there, I almost told him how I really felt.
“Vania, wait!” He was behind me but considering that he’s a guy, it took him less than a second to catch up with me and grabbed me from the back. It was too late. The tears were already streaming down my face. “Hey, baby, why are you crying?” He tilted my body so I was facing him. I was still looking down. Our bodies were very close to each other. His palms were against my face, trying to make me lift my gaze to him and I did.
I stayed quiet while staring at his marvelous beauty.
“What’s wrong? Why did you run away like that?” There was still concern in his voice as he took some of my hair away from my face and put it behind my ear.
I was debating with myself whether to tell him how I really feel or not but in the end, “Harry, I don’t care what you’ll say but the reason why I wasn’t upset at all because of my breakup with my boyfriend is that I don’t love him anymore because I love you.” Tears were streaming down my face again.
I was expecting him to get all mad at me but instead, he leaned down on me and gave me the most passionate kiss. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he tightened his grip on my waist and pulled me closer.
“You don’t know how you made this way easier for me.” He said as we broke the kiss.
“What?” I was confused.
“Remember the girl I was talking about earlier?”
“It was you, Vania.” He smiled. “I just thought if I tell you know, you would hate me considering the fact that you just had a breakup but now that you told me how you really felt about me, well” He let me lose from his grip as he got down on one knee. “Will you be my girl?”
Words can’t describe how I’m feeling right now. I just don’t want this day to end. I want it to stay this way forever. “Of course. Yes! A thousand times yes!” I almost squealed.
He grabbed my hand and kissed it as he got up and kissed me again.